Do you like them?
I have a few friends that just thrive on the idea of surprise. Love to give surprise parties, love to receive surprise gifts or to give surprise, spur-of-the-moment visits. And I have to say, I admire them for it.
I would say that I tend to be a somewhat spontaneous person in certain areas of my life, but you would never put me in the same column as the fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants gal.
Wish I could be more like that, but I am still Miss Planful over here weighing out the pros and the cons of the situation at hand.
It’s just not in my nature.
So, last week, middle of the week, was simply one of those days when everything was going NOT according to plan. A seemingly endless string of work challenges and last-minute surprises/changes, an unforeseen calendar issue that got under my skin, a few late nights at the office that caused me to cancel plans with some friends after work, and then throw in the surprise family injury & illness, and that was my week wrapped up in a nutshell. Wrapped up in one big, chaotic bow.
But, none of it was a surprise to Him.
While driving home last Wednesday from work, incensed, in my own head, upset, and even a little hurt, I begin to pray amidst my bad attitude. And I wondered, why is it so easy for me to trust Him in some things, those easy things I think I can control, and yet so hard to trust Him in others? Why can I not see that none of these occurrences took Him by surprise because He allowed them in my life? Why can I not sit back, relax, stay calm, and allow Him to work in and through me?
Why is it so hard to simply TRUST?
It’s the question that haunts me almost on a daily basis. And as women in particularly, especially us Type-A personalities who thrive on controlling the outcome of certain things, it affects us deeply.
I have to daily engage His Spirit, pray for less of me and more of Him, and ask Him to help me surrender.
I fight this daily.
Ask Him to remind me that I am His, and that He’s got this. Because He’s got me.
And I want Him to have all of me. Nothing held back for selfish reasons or self-righteous gain. I want to be able to humbly offer it all. I want my pride to slip away like a bad habit for me to fully step into knowing the fullness of His plans for me. And to trust Him.
And so, you have joined me on this Trust journey; this daily surrendering, this daily asking. And I pray you encourage me, encourage others, and seek encouragement for yourself.
These times and days we live in feel like a battlezone. A constant tug of war for your heart, your emotions, your time, your resources. Don’t fall prey to the surprises, the distractions, and the decoys as I have. Engage Him daily and surrender.
Lord, I surrender.